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Chris Dolley
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French Fried: one man's move to France with too many animals and an identity thief Kindle Edition

by Chris Dolley (Author) Format: Kindle Edition
4.0 out of 5 stars 891 ratings
** New York Times bestseller **

"Exceptionally funny and entertaining book" - Romonko

Animals behaving badly, other people's misfortunes and the most bizarre true crime story ever. French Fried is the unfortunately true account of Chris Dolley's first eight months in France and has been described as 'A Year in Provence with Miss Marple and Gerald Durrell.'

Just when Chris and Shelagh think nothing more could possibly go wrong, they discover that Chris's identity has been stolen and their life savings - all the money from their house sale in England that was going to finance their new life in France - had disappeared. A bank account had been opened in Chris's name in Spain to take the proceeds.

Then they're abandoned by the police forces of four countries who all insist the crime belongs in someone else's jurisdiction. The French say it's an Irish crime as that's where the money was held. The Irish say it's French as that's where all the correspondence came from. The British say it's nothing to do with them even though forged British passports were used to open the bank account in Spain. And the Spanish are on holiday - and can't even think about investigating any bank account for at least four weeks.

So Chris has to solve the crime himself. But unlike fictional detectives he has an 80 year-old mother-in-law and an excitable puppy who insist they come along if he's going anywhere interesting - like a stakeout.

REVIEWS

"This was a fantastic read. It had me laughing so much that I nearly got relegated to the sofa! Once I had started reading this book, I could not put it down, I was even quite happy to miss my favourite TV programmes!" - Bookmarked

"When I downloaded this book this morning, I had every intention of putting it on my phone and reading it in dribs and drabs. And now I appear to have finished the book! The best thing about 'French Fried' is it's sense of humour; warm, self-deprecating, and very British. Literally laugh out loud in several places (I'm glad I'm the only one home!)." - Librarything

"Chris Dolley's humour reminds me of James Herriot at times, with my husband shushing me in the middle of the night. I could not put this book down and enjoyed it immensely. The characters, especially Nan, were life-size." - Salammi

"I can't think of anybody who wouldn't love this book! Well written, easy to read and laugh out loud funny!" - Brenda, Amazon
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  1. Print length
    222 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publication date
    29 Jun. 2010
  4. File size
    482 KB
  5. Page Flip
    Enabled
  6. Word Wise
    Enabled
  7. Enhanced typesetting
    Enabled
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Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B003UBTVSI
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Book View Cafe (29 Jun. 2010)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 482 KB
  • Simultaneous device usage ‏ : ‎ Unlimited
  • Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 222 pages
  • Customer reviews:
    4.0 out of 5 stars 891 ratings

About the author

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Chris Dolley

Chris Dolley

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Chris Dolley is a New York Times bestselling author, a pioneer computer game designer and a teenage freedom fighter. That was in 1974 when Chris was tasked with publicizing Plymouth Rag Week. Some people might have arranged an interview with the local newspaper. Chris created the Free Cornish Army, invaded the country next door, and persuaded the UK media that Cornwall had risen up and declared independence. As he told the police at the time, 'It was only a small country, and I did give it back.'

In 1981, he created Randomberry Games and wrote Necromancer, one of the first 3D first person perspective D&D computer games.

In 2004, his acclaimed novel, Resonance, was the first book plucked out of Baen's electronic slushpile.

In 2012, his novelette, What Ho, Automaton! was a finalist for the WSFA Small Press Award.

Now he lives in rural France with his wife and a frightening number of animals. They grow their own food and solve their own crimes. The latter out of necessity when Chris's identity was stolen along with their life savings. Abandoned by the police forces of four countries who all insisted the crime originated in someone else's jurisdiction, he had to solve the crime himself. Which he did, and got a book out of it - the International bestseller, French Fried: One Man's Move to France With Too Many Animals And An Identity Thief.

Customer reviews

4 out of 5 stars
891 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the book entertaining and humorous. They describe it as a well-written, enjoyable read with a good twist towards the end. Readers appreciate the author's honest account of living in France and the cultural aspects. The book provides useful insights for anyone moving to France and is considered a self-help guide for Brits.

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73 customers mention ‘Humor’70 positive3 negative

Customers enjoy the book's humor. They find it entertaining and laugh out loud at parts. The author's sense of humor doesn't fade, and he is good at laughing at himself. The humorous style in which the book is written makes it an enjoyable read and enthralling.

"...More than anything it is a very entertaining tale. Whilst it did not have me rolling around in laughter, the tales did make me smile many a time...." Read more

"...A lovely read, pure pleasure with a smile nearly all the way and outright laughter at times...." Read more

"...each telling a different tale, I nevertheless found it to be hugely entertaining with a delightful plot recounted with great humour and measured..." Read more

"Chris Dolley delivers real belly laughs as he describes his emigration to France with his wife, a neurotic horse, a giant recidivist puppy and teo..." Read more

68 customers mention ‘Readability’64 positive4 negative

Customers enjoy the book's readability. They find it well-written and easy to follow, with a lighthearted tone. Many readers appreciate the author's descriptions of thoughts, expectations, and reality.

"...A well written, fun to read book. Well worth the small price - extremely good value. I look forward to Chris's second instalment." Read more

"...A lovely read, pure pleasure with a smile nearly all the way and outright laughter at times...." Read more

"...it to be hugely entertaining with a delightful plot recounted with great humour and measured patience...." Read more

"I really loved this book at the beginning, planned to look at further works of the author but half way through I hit the complete change in..." Read more

17 customers mention ‘Authenticity’17 positive0 negative

Customers enjoy the book's authenticity. They find it a true account of life in France, an amusing account of travelling to France, trying to cope with French bureaucracy, and integrate with village life. The book provides a good insight into a Brit living in France and the funny cultural aspects. It is a great read for any lovers of France and French life.

"...I nevertheless found it to be hugely entertaining with a delightful plot recounted with great humour and measured patience...." Read more

"...A great read for any lovers of France and French life. I also laughed out loud quite a number of times...." Read more

"...the author comes out with some good one liners and is very good at setting the scene...." Read more

"...His descriptions of french life really ring true and he manages to avoid the cliches that often spoil these tales...." Read more

7 customers mention ‘Insight’7 positive0 negative

Customers find the book provides useful insight for those moving to France. It's a well-written, balanced guide that serves as a self-help guide for British people.

"Well written, nicely balanced insight in to one mans changing circumstances with his wife and animals in France...." Read more

"...It gives a good insight into the difference between France & U.S.A. Especially food." Read more

"This is a wonderful self help guide for any Brit moving to France...." Read more

"I enjoyed this, a little on the short side but it provides useful insight for anyone (like me) who intends to move to france" Read more

3 customers mention ‘Ease of use’3 positive0 negative

Customers find the book easy to read and entertaining. They say it provides a straightforward account of how to transport horses.

"...The first half of the book is quite a straightforward account of how to transport horses, cats and dogs to France - or maybe how not to do it...." Read more

"Easy, entertaining reading...." Read more

"...and just shows how easily things can go wrong, and how easy it is to take peoples' money." Read more

6 customers mention ‘Plot’3 positive3 negative

Customers have different views on the plot. Some find it light and ironic, with a clever detective story that keeps them guessing until the end. Others feel the plot is implausible, with too many disasters and amateurish events. The book's narrative style is described as clumsy and like a diary of events.

"...The mystery surrounding the fraud is very compelling and keeps you reading to the end." Read more

"...works of the author but half way through I hit the complete change in direction of his story which whilst important to him spoiled for me what had..." Read more

"Light, ironic, nice setting, little mystery" Read more

"...However I found the plot rather implausible, there are too many "disasters" to have occurred in such a short time to this one couple, and the..." Read more

Top reviews from United Kingdom

  • Sue and Paul
    5.0 out of 5 stars very entertaining read
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 30 January 2012
    Verified Purchase
    If you enjoy reading about the expat experience you will enjoy this book. The first half of the book is quite a straightforward account of how to transport horses, cats and dogs to France - or maybe how not to do it. And then settling into the local community, joining in with the local activities, whether this be football or the local village fetes. Then, in the second half, Chris makes his misfortune of a stolen identity entertaining. I think I, and many others would have been sobbing or angry many a time with the total lack of help, but Chris just shrugs, gets on and solves the crime himself! No mean feat as the crime involves four countries and nobody else seems interested. In fact most people he contacts are more interested in enjoying the local fetes than working. Even his wife and Mother-In-Law seem to just hinder him. It also highlights some differences in culture and attitude between France, Spain and the UK without getting too heavy. More than anything it is a very entertaining tale. Whilst it did not have me rolling around in laughter, the tales did make me smile many a time. If you have ever had or looked after dogs, horses or cats you will know what Chris means when he tells you about the traits and stories of his various menagerie. A well written, fun to read book. Well worth the small price - extremely good value. I look forward to Chris's second instalment.
    6 people found this helpful
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  • S. Warner
    4.0 out of 5 stars A Great Relax!!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 17 August 2011
    Verified Purchase
    Unlike the previous reviewer, the fact the book was set in 1995 did not detract from my pleasure in reading Chris and Shelagh's story at all. As a born clutz I could identify with his day to day chaos, regardless of where that chaos happens! A lovely read, pure pleasure with a smile nearly all the way and outright laughter at times. I only wish he had written the next installment, but to date I have never found one. He brought living in France to life with a different slant from those usually written, where plumbing oft looms large (and late!). I loved the book and would recommend it to anyone who enjoys this genre of literature.
    10 people found this helpful
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  • Sandyydnas
    3.0 out of 5 stars Neither one thing nor another
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 6 January 2013
    Verified Purchase
    This is more a series of vignettes than one long tale, some more interesting than others. (The football section was meaningless to me.) I agree that it is quite funny in parts but found some of the situations rather contrived to amuse, and was irritated by his constant thoughts suggesting wittily what might go wrong. Personally I would have preferred more actual details about how the move was organised, what they actually did and were planning to do when they got there. I'd have liked an explanation, too, of how it was possible that someone could be so silly as to buy a decrepit eight-bedroomed house when they had been looking for a reasonable two-bedroomed one, why his wife would trust someone so obviously inept to go and find a house without her being there too, and why she didn't divorce him when she saw the place.
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  • Ian from the Black Isle.
    5.0 out of 5 stars French Fried and well garnished.
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 14 June 2019
    Verified Purchase
    I have read the earlier reviews and while I agree that the book appears to almost be in two halves, each telling a different tale, I nevertheless found it to be hugely entertaining with a delightful plot recounted with great humour and measured patience. Having owned recalcitrant horses in the past I was able to emphasise with the author's difficulties and his dealings with dogs and awkward relatives also conveyed a ring of truth.
    Great book and looking forward to the sequel.
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  • Janet Hughes
    4.0 out of 5 stars Not your usual memoir :-)
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 10 March 2014
    Verified Purchase
    Chris Dolley delivers real belly laughs as he describes his emigration to France with his wife, a neurotic horse, a giant recidivist puppy and teo warring cats. The move, the house and its eccentricities (and there are many), the local people and of course the famous French Bureaucracy fill the pages with delight and at times despair. I didn't engage as well with the whodunnit part of the story, but that's just me, and not a reflection on Chris's writing. Keep them coming Chris ... when's the next one due?
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  • Clement
    5.0 out of 5 stars A little French is a dangerous thing ...
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 31 December 2014
    Verified Purchase
    I loved this story of Chris and Shelagh's move to France. He has an extremely amusing turn of phrase and I laughed aloud many times. Particularly at the bit where he was running up and down stairs in a hotel with his dog in his arms. It's different from many other stories of English people moving to France in that they are targeted by an identity thief. This I felt added a totally new dimension and is a warning to others. Their difficulties with the broad regional accent of south-west France was a cause of much amusement. I'd love to see a sequel.
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  • Gina Brown
    2.0 out of 5 stars Good read at first but degenerated into a rant
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 30 June 2018
    Verified Purchase
    I really loved this book at the beginning, planned to look at further works of the author but half way through I hit the complete change in direction of his story which whilst important to him spoiled for me what had been an interesting story of another families move to France. Unfortunately the latter part of the turned into a rant which was not actually clear that the rest of the story would be subsumed by this.
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  • Froggie
    4.0 out of 5 stars French Farce
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 6 February 2012
    Verified Purchase
    French Fried: one man's move to France with too many animals and an identity thief

    I certainly enjoyed this book and the fact that it reflects on life in France a few years ago, did not put me off. A great read for any lovers of France and French life. I also laughed out loud quite a number of times. Amazon Kindle has done us a favour with many good books like this at great prices.
    7 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

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  • L. A. Garner
    5.0 out of 5 stars I seriously could not stop laughing!
    Reviewed in the United States on 25 January 2013
    Verified Purchase
    I read this book while on an overnight flight to Italy. I kept laughing so hard that I was shaking the seats of the people around me, who were trying to sleep!

    I have not laughed so hard in a very, very long time. This book is utterly hilarious. Chris's writing style is an incomparable vehicle for telling the story of his crazy--and sometimes nearly unbelievable--experiences while moving to France. He is quintessentially British, and the humor of his statements shows that. For instance, when describing his puppy, he says, "Which brings us to the dog, Gypsy, a four-month-old lurcher. For anyone unfamiliar with the breed, the lurcher is the one that fills the gap between the Irish Wolf Hound and the crocodile. She was immense. And her favourite game was dragging her favourite toy across the floor. Sad to say, her favourite toy was my leg. What can I say? I have highly desirable ankles."

    And here's his description of the "creative" decorating he found while house-hunting in France:
    "Then there was the toilet in the Dordogne.

    Now, I've seen toilets before -- I'm a man of the world -- and under the stairs has always been a popular space-saving location but ... at the foot of the stairs? With no privacy? Placed such that to climb the stairs one had to squeeze past the bowl?

    I stood at the foot of the stairs, staring in amazement, and wondered -- could the stairs have been a later addition? Maybe there was nowhere else to put the staircase when the upper floor was converted?
    No. I looked; the plumbing appeared more recent than the staircase.
    For days afterwards, I theorised and explored various possibilities for the unique placement of the toilet. It was like one of those mental agility tests starring dwarves in lifts. Could the owner have had one leg shorter than the other and needed the first step for balance?"

    In addition to the foibles of moving, Chris and his wife, Shelagh, had to turn detective to find out who had stolen their identities and, in the process, all the money from the sale of their house in England. The craziness that ensued makes for excellent storytelling, and Chris's writing skills make it even more exquisite.

    This book will be enjoyable for anyone, but especially for: those who enjoy traveling, have ever had to move, have animals with personalities living in their homes, or ever wondered about weird choices a previous homeowner made.
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  • Kindle Customer
    5.0 out of 5 stars Laughter is the best medecine.
    Reviewed in Canada on 8 February 2018
    Verified Purchase
    This book is a great way to lift your spirits. Keep a box of tissues handy to dry your eyes. My dog could not figure out why I kept trying to laugh, breath and bend over double at the same time. I hope I will enjoy Chris Dolley's other books as much.
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  • Lio78l
    5.0 out of 5 stars RAS
    Reviewed in France on 24 January 2015
    Verified Purchase
    La livraison s'est déroulée comme prévue sur le site. Le produit est arrivée bien protégé et dans un très bon état.
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  • daniela
    1.0 out of 5 stars Noioso
    Reviewed in Italy on 18 September 2015
    Verified Purchase
    Ho acquistato questo libro invogliato dalle ottime recensioni ma è stato deludente. Troppo esagerato e continuo nelle disavventure dei protagonisti, dopo un po'annoia. Il cane lo vorresti sopprimere perché troppo problematico per essere divertente, lo stesso la suocera e la squadra di football
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  • alianthia
    2.0 out of 5 stars Not worth my time
    Reviewed in Canada on 6 July 2022
    Verified Purchase
    Didn't finish . It never kept my interest and I generally love travel books( and France) Everyone has their own opinion ....
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